In periods of overwhelm, it might be challenging to remember in the moment, but it’s important to get back into a grounded state. When we are grounded and centered, the chaos, unknown, or moments of feeling like life is too much, we can see more opportunities and creative ways of handling them. Overwhelm can lead to worry, keeping you in a dizzying cycle of “will it always be like this? I don’t know what to do. I just want to turn it all off. What if I never figure it out?”
These thoughts and feelings aren’t helpful to anyone, especially yourself.
I am no stranger to intense life changes, the unknown, or feeling like I never have time to do it all. I’m going through another rough, but necessary, transition in my life that includes a breakup, moving, two children, growing a new business, and stepping into unknown legal terrain. I’ve also lost my father, had a baby naturally and ecstatically while going to school and then graduating, lost my oldest’s father to suicide leaving me as the sole parent, left an ex because I feared for my life the day after my dad died, quit all jobs and opened a business with very little clientele, and many more challenges, all in under five years!
Each time, I could’ve given in to the overwhelm and used ways to numb out my reality, give up, have a mental breakdown, or take up drugs, including prescriptions. I don’t think anyone would blame me. Instead, I intuitively went deep into myself. I took care of me, my body, my mind, my roots. I especially needed to do this because of my children. We cannot be the parents they need if we are flying around the outside of our wheel and not rooted in the middle. We end up going nowhere and our children suffer for it.
Self-care is such a loaded term. It brings up images of bubble baths, journals, therapy, and retreats. Those are amazing things! But self-care is so much more and can include a huge array of activities and practices. For me, going to my roots and mothering myself is the most important step. Mothering myself is the greatest act of self-love I can think of. No one else is going to save me, so I gotta take responsibility for me!
How you Mother Yourself might look different, after all, this is about you trusting you. But, we all need examples sometimes. Here are a few ways I get to find my way back to center.
Movement:
Move your body! Shake it, dance, run, punch pillows, jump, skip, lift weights, stomp on the ground, or just go for a mind-clearing walk.
Moving helps to complete the stress response cycle so you’re not stuck in chronic fight/flight/freeze mode.
The mind lives in the body, so when we address the body, the mind becomes more clear, opening us up to opportunity rather than worry.
Pleasure Practices:
Pleasure is super yummy for our nervous system. I like to see it as an alchemist, digesting pain, trauma, and intense emotions into golden energy to use for creativity, a happy life, and magnetism.
There are so many ways to experience pleasure that aren’t sexual, but self-play is a great way to tap right in.
Find things that bring you pleasure and enjoy them for the sake of pleasure.
Reach out and I’ll give you a free practice to try at home!
Be A Five Star Parent To Yourself:
Give yourself a routine. Buy healthy foods. Cook and dance and the same time. Practice better sleep hygiene. Brush your teeth. Bathe. What would a great mom do for her kids?
Clean Up Your Physical Surroundings:
Excess clutter is a reflection of and can be the the cause of mental overwhelm. Keep your spaces clear for energy to flow. Purge- give away, recycle, sell, toss out anything that is not serving you. If an item reminds you of someone you are no longer in relationship with or whom you’re holding resentment, let it go!
Breathwork:
Some of my best ideas and a-ha moments come from my breathwork practice. It takes me out of my judging and analytical brain and into my deeper knowing and unconscious. It opens me up, calms me down, energizes, and keeps me physically healthy and resilient.
I can’t say enough good things about breathwork. Here’s a link to one of my favorite guides breathwork sessions.
These are just a few things to try out to bring you back to center. The best way to keep your resolve strong is to practice these BEFORE a crisis occurs.
Let me know what you try!
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